| Parent upset kid is at this school | Hors d'oeuvres Bonus: Someone takes some to-go |
Parent excited kid will rush for their fraternity/sorority | Coffee | Loud ringing cell phone Bonus: They stare at it while it rings |
| Sleeping parent | Parent dropping ACT/SAT scores | Campus Bookstore | Student's boyfriend/girlfriend already goes here | Meaningless statistics about the incoming class of freshmen |
| You hear of a major you never knew existed "Is that real?" |
University administrator which nobody is too sure what they do | FREE SPACE |
Swag vultures (they grab 2 or 3 of all the free stuff) |
Parent asking how to check student grades Bonus: School doesn't mention FERPA |
| Crying Mom or Dad | Worrisome parent Asks "what if..." too much |
Parent telling everyone how smart their kid is | Entire family in tow | Parent discussing "full ride" scholarship |
| Know It All parent explaining things for school | Parent explaining why they turned down Ivy League school Bonus: "It wasn't a good fit" |
Lost/late parent Bonus: They apologize loudly |
Living vicariously through student | Question for every topic |